Down the Drain

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The NomadPoet
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Posts:78
Joined:Sat Jan 03, 2009 4:38 pm
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Fri Jan 16, 2009 8:45 am

[quote name="eizzy.k"]I turn the shower on

And let the water drip, slip, down into the drain

Washing away the day’s remains.

Limp limbs hanging heavy

Nice intro, it took me into the shower with you, I like the way you hind at what the end will be like in these first few lines . . .

Can’t hold onto my thoughts

Like water through fingers, dripping

Briliant metaphor . . .

I release a sigh,

That comes out a cry

And sounds hollow

And dry

I was left in awe by your wordplay here . . .

Washing my body,

Cleansing my soul,

As I am physically mentally emotionally

Drained…

And then of cause what makes every poem, a conclusive ending.

All and all a very nice write,

RESPECT

:( [/quote]
PassionatePisces
Junior Member
Posts:19
Joined:Sat Jan 14, 2006 8:24 am
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Tue Jan 20, 2009 6:29 pm

It really is that way sometimes but the way that your words were arranged was CRAZY... I mean good crazy! I can never look at a shower in the same way again Nice writing skills*****
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